The Mind Behind Love

"Why am I always the one who has to be the bigger person?"You're the one who thinks before reacting. You initiate the hard conversations. You apologize first. You regulate your emotions — not just for your sake, but for the relationship. And slowly, that maturity starts to feel less like a strength… and more like a weight.Being emotionally mature doesn’t mean you should always be the emotional c..

Why does choosing yourself feel like betrayal?You say no to something you don’t want. You take a day off. You set a boundary. And suddenly, guilt floods in. Not because you did something wrong — but because you finally did something for yourself.This guilt is not a sign that you’re selfish — it’s a sign you were trained to self-abandon.If your worth was tied to being “good,” “helpful,” or “selfl..

Do you feel worthy only when you're useful to others?Many people confuse being needed with being loved. On the surface, it may look like compassion or selflessness — always helping, fixing, supporting. But deep down, it’s often rooted in a dangerous belief: “If I’m not needed, I’m not enough.”This pattern usually forms in childhood, especially in environments where love was conditional. If you h..

Self-Worth & Attachment Series – Episode 7: Why You Feel Guilty for Having NeedsYou ask for something small—time, attention, comfort—and immediately feel a wave of guilt. You shrink your voice. You over-explain. You wonder if you're being "too much" for wanting something that others seem to expect so easily.This guilt doesn’t come from weakness—it comes from wounds. In this post, Dr. Paul Lee ex..

The Fear of Being Too Much: When Your Emotions Feel Like a Burden (Self-Worth & Attachment Series #4)Have you ever stopped yourself from expressing how you feel because you didn’t want to scare someone away? Do you often feel like your needs, emotions, or thoughts are “too much”? You’re not alone.Many people—especially those with low self-worth or anxious attachment—grow up believing that expres..